 |
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| I
DON'T NEED A BAROMETER. I CAN LOOK INTO A GIRLS' EYES AND TELL WHETHER! |
'VERY
HANDY FOLDING BED, SIR, IF YOU'RE FURNISHING A SMALL FLAT.' 'AND - ER -
DO INSTRUCTIONS GO WITH IT?' |
I'M
GLAD MOTHER INSISTED ON MY BRINGING THIS BOOK WITH ME! |
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| OH
GIRLS! I'VE BEEN KISSED ON THE BREAKWATER!! |
'WELL,
DID THE DOCTOR FIND OUT WHAT WAS THE MATTER WITH YOU?'
'OH, YES - HE PUT HIS FINGER ON THE SPOT AT ONCE! |
I
WENT TO THE SALES BUT ALL I GOT WAS A COMPOUND FRACTURE BETWEEN THE 'LAIDIES
UNDERWEAR' AND THE 'BARGAIN BASEMENT'! |
 |
 |
 |
| TAKE
OFF YER EAR-PHONES, MAGGIE - THEY'RE ABOOT TAE TAK' UP THE COLLECTION! |
I
SAID MY INTENTIONS WERE 'STRICTLY HONOURABLE', NOT 'STRICTLY HORRIBLE'!
OR SO THAT'S THE SORT OF GIRL YOU ARE! I MIGHT HAVE FOUND IT OUT TOO LATE
AT LAST MY EYES ARE OPENED - OR ONE OF 'EM IS AT ANY RATE! |
MOTHER
SAYS THIS BOOK IS NOT FIT FOR A YOUNG GIRL TO READ - I QUITE AGREE WITH
HER! |
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| LITTLE
GIRLS LIKE TO PLAY WITH PAINTED DOLLS AND LITTLE BOYS LIKE TO PLAY WITH
SOLDIERS. WHEN THEY GROW UP, THE GIRLS LIKE TO PLAY WITH SOLDIERS AND THE
BOYS LIKE TO PLAY WITH PAINTED DOLLS! |
'CHEER
UP, THERE ARE PLENTY MORE FISH IN THE SEA.'
'YES, BUT I DON'T WANT TO MARY A FISH!' |
'A
BOTTLE OF THAT SCENT, MADAM, AND YOU HAVE THE MEN JUST WHERE YOU WANT 'EM!
'WELL, YOU OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED TO SELL IT!!' |
