WILLIAM HEATH ROBINSON (1872-1944)

WHEN TEA AS WELL AS SUGAR IS RATIONED AN ELEGANT CONTRAPTION FOR SMART OCCASIONS FROM THE SERIES WHEN THE SHIRT DOES NOT COME HOME FROM THE WASH
THE SERVANT IN THE HOUSE OUR GRANDFATHERS AND THEIR VICTORIAN FIANCEES OR A RESPECTABLE FAMILY CHRISTMAS NUMBER: NASH'S MAGAZINE COVER
THE NEW FRUIT TREE PRUNER WITH INGENIOUS ADJUSTMENT 
FOR AUTOMATICALLY LIME WASHING THE BARK WHILE 
PRUNING THE BRANCHES TESTING CORN PLASTERS IN THE SALON OF A FASHIONABLE WEST END CHIROPODIST THE REAL SOLDIER
A BRAINY OLD HUN SETTLING THE DANUBE DIFFICULTY BY STOPPING THE RIVER AT ITS SOURCE COMMUNITY SINGING.
WHAT IT IS LIKELY TO LEAD TO 'FULL MOON' 
TILL, CLIMBING SLOWLY ON HER WAY, SHE VANISHED, AND WAS GONE
WHO SAID 'PEACOCK PIE'? HARD TO BEAT:  THE RECORD THE KINDLY CADDY-BIRD OF ST ANDREWS PURSUING ITS DAILY ROUND
WEEPS SHE NEVER, BUT SOMETIMES SIGHS, 
AND PEEPS AT HER GARDEN WITH BRIGHT BROWN EYES A CLOUD DISPELLER DESIGNED BY THE FIRST LORD DISCOVERING A HEINKEL BOMBER HIDING IN A CLOUD ENVY
HANS ANDERSEN'S FAIRY TALES A HAND-MADE MIRROR WHICH ANY LADY WOULD BE PROUD TO PEER AT AN ORDINARY GOLF-BAG BECOMES AN EXCEPTIONALLY IMPOSING FLOWER-POT
THE EIGHTEENTH HOLE COMPRESSED BILLIARDS FOR MAISONETTES THE RAJAH
A FLAT WEDDING ABOU HASSAN WAS IN THE MOST INEXPRESSIBLE AMAZEMENT PLAN OF A FOUR ROOMED FLAT WARMED BY ONE STOVE
THE DRESSER-PIANO A LITTLE MECHANICAL HELP IN RISING GRACEFULLY FROM A LOUNGE CHAIR PETS' PLAY-GROUND TRYPLIT MANSIONS MAIDA VALE
THE DINNER GONG IN SERVICE FLATS THE NEW REAR WHEEL GEAR FOR TURNING THE CAR RIGHT ROUND IN ONE MOVEMENT DEMONSTRATING BEFORE THE HIGHWAYS COMMITTEE THE RESILIENCE OF DUROID.
1935 MAYOR AND MAYORESS IN STATE ATTENDED BY THE SURVEYOR AND HIGHWAYS COMMITTEE OPENING THE NEW DUROID MACADAM ROAD.
1975 THE SAME COMMITTEE WATCHING VAIN ENDEAVOURS TO SCARIFY THE ROAD AT A LATER DATE. THE TEST FOR FREEDOM FROM BLEEDING AND PICKING UP CHRISTMAS PRESENTS – SOME OF THIS SEASONS NOVELTIES
HO, HO, HO, HO, HOW GLAD I AM THE LORD SUCKFIST PLEADED BEFORE PANTAGRUEL SILLY POINTS:
HOW CRICKET IS PLAYED IN MOUNTAINOUS DISTRICTS
BIRDS-NESTING IN THE ADIRONDACKS. THE BIRDS'NESTER'S REBUFF
MRS EAGLE - SEND HIM TO COVENTRY MY DEARS WE'LL HAVE NO LIVING STATUARY HERE THE ELFIN KING'S HOUSE KEEPER HOW TO DO WITHOUT THE MANTLE SHELF IN A MODERN FLAT
MRS SNIFKIN DREAMILY AS SHE SMELLS BURNING - DEAR! DEAR!  HE'S SMOKING THAT CHEAP TOBACCO AGAIN PETER QUINCE PATRIOTIC OLD DEARS ENDEAVOURING TO MAKE LIFE AS SWEET AS POSSIBLE DURING THE SCARCITY OF SUGAR
TRIBOULET XMAS LEGENDS - THE FIRST ROAST TURKEY
AN OLD LEGEND THAT ATTRIBUTED THE DISCOVERY OF ROAST TURKEY TO THE MONKS IN THE 13TH CENTURY DISGUISING SHELLS FOR SHIPMENT IN NEUTRAL BOTTLES
A 'GROUSE AS USUAL' OUTRAGE BY A GERMAN OFFICER THE PEACEFUL CONVERSION OF A TORPEDO TO A FOOT-WARMER AND OPENS 'IS AS IF 'E WAS GOIN' TO SHOW ME 'IS FINE SET OF TEETH
AN UNRECORDED ECLIPSE OF THE SUN
AN ASTRONOMICAL NOTE NEW SEASIDE SPORTS THE KISS OF PEACE 1916-1917
NOTHING DOING
A CLEVER METHOD OF OVERCOMING DISPARITY OF HEIGHT IN THE KAISER'S NEW ARMY ANTICIPATION AND DISAPPOINTMENT
WHY SANTA CLAUS CHANGED HIS MIND TRULY, THE MOON SHINES WITH A GOOD GRACE
THE PROLOGUE I SHALL KNOW THAT YOUR GOOD IS MINE THIS FOR THE MAPLE LEAF
THE SIXTH COLUMN
THE SIXTH COLUMN FRUSTRATE A VAIN ATTEMPT BY THE FIFTH TO STARVE US OUT BY POISONING THE PIGEONS IN TRAFALGAR SQUARE ENEMY ICE MORTARS FOR PREVENTING PURSUIT WHEN CROSSING FROZEN RIVERS ONE OF THE CLEVERLY CAMOUFLAGED ALL WAYS GUNS ON THE SIEGFRIED LINE
COLD CHARITY
A KIND HEARTED PRUSSIAN OFFICER GIVING HIS CLOTHES TO A NEEDY BELGIAN PEASANT STRANGE THINGS THAT DON'T OFTEN HAPPEN AT GOLF NECESSITY IS THE MOTHER OF INVENTION
SOME INGENIOUS SUGGESTIONS FOR GIVING THE BOWLER A BETTER CHANCE - TO BE CONSIDERED BY THE MCC AS ALTERNATIVES TO THE RIDICULOUS NEW REGULATION FOR SMALLER BALLS SENSIBLE MEASURES TO BE TAKEN IN THE EVENT OF A HEAT WAVE INVADING OUR SHORES THE NEW YEAR'S BEDROOM
SUITE DE LUXE
NOBLE EFFORT BY THE ITALIAN COLONY IN LONDON TO MAKE A 'DO' OF THE ITALIAN EXHIBITION AT BURLINGTON HOUSE THE OTHER POINT OF VIEW
MOTHER 'FLU GERM TO HER YOUNGEST - COME BACK AT ONCE, FLUELLYN, - CAN'T YOU SEE HE'S GOT IT ALREADY, - YOU'LL CATCH IT YOURSELF BEFORE YOU'VE DONE, AND GIVE IT TO THE REST OF THE FAMILY A MERE MATTER OF FORM
DISTRESSING MISTAKE OF THE COOK RECENTLY RELEASED FROM A MUNITION FACTORY
THE HOMEMADE CHRISTMAS PRESENT SOMETHING ON EACH WAY
A FISH TRAGEDY THE LANGUAGE OF EGGS
SOME NEW DESIGNS FOR EASTER EGGS TO FACILITATE THE EXCHANGE OF GRACEFUL SENTIMENTS AND AMOROUS MESSAGES
SELLING IRISH SWEEPSTAKE TICKETS UNDER THE EYES OF THE LAW THE MOTHER EARTH WORM TO ITS WORMLET - NOW THEN FLORIZEL, THAT JUST SERVES YOU RIGHT, - HOW OFTEN HAVE I TOLD YOU TO KEEP AWAY FROM THE WICKET DURING THESE TEST MATCHES CASABIANCA OF THE LINKS
ANOTHER ILLUSTRATED CROSSWORD PUZZLETTE ACROSS - 1. **** EXCLAMATION SUMMER TROUBLES IN THE TROPICS - SNAKE CASTS ON THE SAHARA GOLF COURSE KNOCKING THE GROUND FROM BENEATH HIS FEET
THE TOO VIGOROUS GOLFER - NOW I HAVE JUST ABOUT CUT MYSELF OFF
AN UNFORTUNATE BACK-HANDER AT ST ANDREWS A GENTLE GAME OF RUGBY IN THE BOTANICAL GARDENS THE ALL-WAYS-AT-ONCE INCENDIARY EXTINGUISHER
BUYING A NEW WIFE IN THE STONE AGE PUSSY-CAT, PUSSY-CAT, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? CLAPPING HER PLATTER STOOD PLUMP BESS
THE HUNTSMAN INTERESTING SIDELIGHTS ON THE WIG INDUSTRY (MASS PRODUCTION FOR THE MILLIONS) THERE WAS A SHIP OF RIO SAILED OUT INTO THE BLUE AND NINE AND NINETY MONKEYS WERE ALL HER JOVIAL CREW
WHEN THE SHIRT DOES NOT COME HOME FROM THE WASH AN APPROPRIATE GUARD OF HONOUR AT THE WEDDING OF A DOMESTICATED COUPLE RONDIBILIS
LOUPGAROU I SHALL MAKE THEM A FAIRE LONG SERMON ALL VERY BUSILY EMPLOYED IN SEEKING OF RUSTIE PINS
HE CAUSED TO BE HONOURABLY BURIED IN BLACK-SOILEE-VALLEY THEY FELL TO 'T BURN'D WITH A LINGRING FIRE
HE WAS A LITTLE QUEAER OLD FELLOW HEAR-SAY WORK, CLOWN, WORK
HE ALSO CAUS'D TO BE BOUGHT THREE FINE YOUNG UNICORNS COME, COME, SAID JUPITER TO MERCURY GOODY PENIA
THE DEVIL WAS SICK, THE DEVIL A MONK WOU'D BE HAVING DISCOVER'D AN AMBUSCADE OF SQUOB-CHITTERLINGS MY HATCHET, LORD JUPITER, MY HATCHET
I BELIEVE 'TIS THE UNHOLY HOLIDAY OF ALL THE DEVIL'S CREW THE MAN'S EMPHATICALLY MAD, WHO DRINKS THE BEST, YET CAN BE SAD WHEN JOLLY COMPANIONS CAROUSE IT TOGETHER, A FIG FOR THE STORM; IT GIVES WAY TO GOOD WEATHER
BRIDLEGOOSE HER TRIPPA IN THE SCRAMBLING TRENCHES OF AN EGG ARSENAL 
GREAT BRITISH INDUSTRIES - DULY PROTECTED
HOME PRACTICE FOR THE GOLFING NOVICE A TRAINED EARLY BIRD COMPELLING A WORM TO TURN BEFORE IT CASTS HOLED OUT
THE WARNING MIRROR FOR LOUNGE USERS THE CONVERSION OF A BATHROOM INTO A SMOKING LOUNGE AND SCULLERYETTE THE DAILY DUST COLLECTION
THIN WALLS THE SMELL OF SCORCHING HE DASHED AFTER THE ELEPHANT

WILLIAM HEATH ROBINSON (1872-1944)

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