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CATCHING BUTTERFLIES
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HARRISON'S FARM
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LADY VISITOR: SO THE OTHER CHILDREN HAVE HAD MEASLES. WHAT HAVE YOU HAD, MICHAEL?
MICHAEL (PROUDLY): QUALANTINE
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'WANT A NEW DOLLY, DEAR? WHY DON'T YOU LOVE JILL ANYMORE?'
'OH, YES, I LOVE JILL; BUT SHE'S GETTING SO TIRED OF ME.'
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RATHER PLEASED WITH OUR COMBINED EFFORTS
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SUPER REFINED LITTLE GIRL: YOU KNOW, LUCY, I HAVE ONLY ONE FAULT TO FIND WITH OUR PIGS, THEY WILL GRUNT WITH THEIR MOUTHS FULL
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LIZZIE ARRIVED IN A FOUR WHEELER
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SNEAKING AS CLOSE AS I DARED
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OUR HECTIC HEADLINES.
GRANNY: 'HEY DEAR CHILD, PLEASE BE CAREFUL GOING HOME, I SEE IN A VERY BIG PRINT HERE THAT THERE'S SUCH A LOT OF THIS SWEEP STAKE FEVER ABOUT'
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GENIAL VENTRILOQUIST-CONJURER. 'NOW IS THERE ANY SPECIAL TRICK YOU WOULD LIKE ME TO DO, CHILDREN?'
LITTLE WILLIE. 'OH, PLEASE COULD YOU MAKE A WHITE RABBIT COME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH, WITHOUT MOVING YOUR LIPS, AND PRETEND IT CAME FROM AUNTIE'S?'
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PAMELA: 'HOW'S YOUR WIFE, PETER?'
PETER: 'SHE DIED LAST TUESDAY'
PAMELA: 'ARE YOU SORRY?'
PETER: 'SORRY? OF COURSE I'M SORRY, I LIKED THE WOMAN.'
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THE INSPIRED MUSICIAN AND THE CHRISTMAS HAM
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BEGINNER'S LUCK
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HOLIDAYS -
I MUST GO DOWN TO THE SEA AGAIN, TO THE LONELY SEA AND THE SKY
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THE MAGIC RING: I IN MY SUNDAY KNICKERBOCKERS SHE IN HER PINK SPANGLES
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MOTHER (DISCUSSING THE NEW BABY'S NAME). 'I'D LIKE HECTOR; IT'S SUCH A MANLY NAME.'
PAMELA: 'OH, MUMMY, I WANT JACK; IT'S SUCH A BOYLY ONE.'
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MOTHER. "WELL, REALLY, MICHAEL, THE FOG IS SO THINK I AM AFRAID WE MUST GIVE UP THE IDEA OFF GOING TO THE ZOO."
MICHAEL. "OH, MOTHER, WE SIMPLY MUST GO. I'VE PU IT DOWN IN MY DIARY THAT WE WENT."
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TO BRIGHTEN THE MODERN PICTURE-SHOW, COULD NOT PEOPLE BE PERSUADED TO POSE IN FRONT OF THEIR OWN PORTRAITS?
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THE TRAFFIC CENSUS SHOWS THAT AN AVERAGE OF A HUNDRED-AND-EIGHTEEN BARROWS PASS HYDE PARK CORNER EVERY TWELVE HOURS OF DAYLIGHT. WE TREMBLE TO THINK WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF ALL THESE TRIED TO PASS AT THE SAME TIME.
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SMALL SON OF ARTIST (MAKING THE MOST OF PARENTS' TEMPORARY ABSENCE): STILL-LIFE STUDY OF MINE OF ENGINE AND GUARD'S VAN. JUST A POT-BOILER, YOU KNOW.
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A NIGHTINGALE SANG TO HIM WHILE HE ATE HIS SIMPLE DEJEUNER
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ROAD SENSE - CYCLING IV
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TO A HEALTHY-MINDED CHILD OF SEVEN A POINT-LACE COLLAR IS EVEN MORE OBNOXIOUS THAN A HOT BATH
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ELDERLY NOVICE: LET ME SEE-THIS IS THE NINTH. YES-A VERY THICKY ZIG ZAG ONE. IT'S WHAT THEY CALL A GATE-LEGGED HOLE.
YOUNG NOVICE: DON'T YOU MEAN DOG'S-EARED?
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MOTHER. 'DARLING, WHY NOT LET MUMMIE SQUASH YOUR STRAWBERRIES FOR YOU? THEY'RE SO MUCH NICER LIKE THAT.'
MOLLIE. 'OH, NO, MUMMIE, PLEASE NOT. I LIKE TO TASTE THE SHAPE OF THEM.'
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SMALL BOY (TO MOTHER): THERE ARE THREE PERSONS THAT I LOVE - YOU AND NANNY AND ME;
BUT ME'S MY FAVOURITE.
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WE ALL LANDED IN THE STREAM
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A JOLLY HOUSEHOLD THOUGH RATHER NOISY
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SETTLED DOWN TO AN EXCHANGE OF HIGHLY COLOURED BADINAGE
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ETHEL ACTED AS CONJURER
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DANCED TO THE MECHANICAL ORGAN
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VERY YOUNG PLUTOCRAT (LEFT IN THE CAR WHILE HIS PARENTS PAY A CALL). 'THE PENNY BAZAAR, JOHN.'
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RIDING IS SO POPULAR THAT IT WILL SOON BE A PROBLEM FINDING SUFFICIENT MOUNTS
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THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE MOTOR-PRAM AT KENSINGTON
CHRISTENING CUP DAY AY THE ROUND POND TRACK
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UNCLE: 'AH! ROBERT, I SEE YOU COLLECT CIGARETTE CARDS.'
ROBERT: 'YES, UNCLE, I DO, BUT FROM PURELY AESTHETIC INTERESTS.'
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THE GREAT FLOWER SHOW; OR, GARDENERS' GRIEF.
MR DUFF COOPER. 'I WISH I COULD GET MINE TO LOOK LIKE SOME OF THE FOREIGN EXHIBITS.'
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"THEIR OWNER WILLING TO PART WITH THEM FOR THE PRICE MARKED ON THE TICKET"
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THEY PILED ON MORE COALS, SHOVELLING FURIOUSLY
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WINNIE-THE-POOH AND THE HUNNY-POT
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WINNIE-THE-POOH
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DEVOTED MYSELF TO THE PASSIONATE ABSORBING OF EVERY DETAIL
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LONDON LANDSCAPE
RIGID DERRICKS RANKING
ON THE SKY-FALL'S PURPLE CANOPY...
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DISPENSED HOSPITALITY THAT EVENING TO A GLASSY-EYED STIFF-KNEED CIRCLE
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THE ROOM WAS VERY STILL AS I APPROACHED THE BUREAU
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THE MURDER RE-ENACTED
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SET OF TEA-THINGS IN THE TOY-SHOP WINDOW
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AND MADE CAPTURE OF HIM
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BUT ALL THE SAME YOU GIVE THEM A GOOD TALKING
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THE MUMMERS
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DIG MY GARDEN RIGHT OVER FROM END TO END
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TURNED UPON AND SAVAGELY MALTREATED HIM
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BUT I LINGERED A MOMENT - IN THE STILL FROSTY AIR
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THE COUNCILLOR HAD TO DANCE WITH IT
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GRASSES, TWIGS, AND CONES WE FOUND -
FIRES THEY'LL MAKE TO PLAY AROUND
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RECTORY VISIT
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THE REAPER
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SAID IT WAS NOT HIS DAUGHTER
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